When I was around 8, I had a Barbie Dreamhouse. I didn't have a single Barbie, but I had the Barbie Dreamhouse. That's where my Star Wars figures lived. That's how much I loved them. I still remember the day our poodle chewed the head off of Darth Vadar. I found the body in the front yard, cordoned off the area, created a grid, and searched for his head until dinner. I never recovered it. Burning the plastic Lord Vadar in the back yard on a pyre of oleander sticks seemed only appropriate.
Recently, I bought my two older boys Lego Star Wars for the Wii. Little did I know the effects it would have. The game loosely follows the movies - there are cut scenes once you've completed your mission. The same characters die at the same intervals. So, the boys thought they were quite the Star Wars experts. Obviously, I needed to school them. We set out to watch all 6 movies; and now - my kids are schooling me.
For instance, I didn't know the names of all the bounty hunters Jaba sent out after Han Solo. But, after my oldest introduced me to Wookieepedia.com, I'm quite learned (MD, that's for you). I thought the "alien in the orange suit" was just a bounty hunter. Who knew he was Bossk (which means 'devours his prey' in Dosh), a Trandoshan bounty hunter...
Now, my kids ask me questions I'm ill-prepared to answer. Like, "Mom, if Anakin had never gone bad and he had grown to fight the Emperor, would he have won? I mean, Qui-Gon Jinn and Obi-Wan knew that his midi-chlorian count was off the charts." I answered with all the pompousness I could muster. Put your best monocle-on-the-eye face on and speak with a British accent, "According to the prophesy, Anakin was the chosen one, so he would have eventually beaten the Emperor and returned peace to the galaxy." I'm not sure of the answer, but the absolute cockiness of it gave them satisfaction. I get 10-20 of these questions a DAY.
Could I have been this obnoxious as a Star Wars fan when I was 8?
Two words...oleander pyre.
5 comments:
I can't believe how much C looks like S in those pics. I wish I could write like you. Will you please write my thesis for me?
Very nice. Did you check out the awesome toy yet? This posting makes it seem more like a necessity in your house at this point. The pics are the perfect touch. We1l done m'lady, well done.
I don't understand a single word of this. I think you lost me at lego star wars for the wii, but the pics are precious:)
Funny, my Luke Skywalker X-Wing pilot figure came to his final resting place in the backyard. That's where he lost his head - literally - after jumping around celebrating yet another victory over the Empire.
I can vouch for the oleander bushes never realizing they had been a part of the pyre. And Dori has admitted to us many things she participated in at the age of 8 that would put any parents' anxieties on high alert if they knew it was going on (it's okay if your kids don't tell you everything until the age of 30.)
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