Magic Woods

When I was younger, I spent a lot of time in Kilgore at my grandparents' house. What I most liked to do was traipse through the woods looking for unicorns. I'd say I spent from 6-years old to 10-years old looking for unicorns in those woods. There was a clearing where the sun shone down through the trees in streams of light and the pine needles gave way to funny green plants that grew just tall enough to hide you if you laid down flat. I waited in that clearing for what seemed like years. My unicorn never came, and eventually I grew up and stopped playing in the woods.

This Thanksgiving, we went to my parents' house. They live next door to my grandmother, so they have the same woods as a back yard. The weather was so beautiful Thursday and we hardly saw the kids because they spent all day outside (thank goodness my city boys are getting a little country influence). I took my camera outside with me to capture them being kids and I was rewarded with magic.

When I first walked into the trees, the smell transported me back in time. Pine needles and decaying leaves and earth under my feet felt like a crunchy cloud. I used to make forts out of branches and pile up this material for a bed. I had to stop and close my eyes and breath in as deeply as I could. Crickets were chirruping and the wind blew through the leaves. I heard the kids laughing and running through underbrush. They were swinging from trees that I swung from. They were challenging one another to jump over the wide part of the creek. They found sticks to use as swords and battled creatures I couldn't see. I played these games. My mom and my uncles grew up in those woods playing the same games.

Woods that transport you. Woods that hold the promise of adventure. Woods that sing. Woods that smell like a memory.

Magic woods.

Alas, my time was cut short by my younger children needing me inside and so I was carried back to reality with camera in hand. I took the pictures I wanted and began walking up to the house.

The three oldest cousins came galloping into the yard from the trees. Each of them riding their own unicorn. They'd found them in the woods. Pearce explained to me that I couldn't see the unicorns because a special creature hadn't spit in my eyes (he's reading the Spiderwick Chronicles). What he didn't know was this - I could so clearly see the unicorns. And they were beautiful.

The pictures of our Austin trip I won't post anywhere but here

Sometimes, I really wonder how I manage to stumble through life as what appears to be a well-adjusted adult.

If you are on Facebook, you know that I had quite an interesting trip to Austin last weekend with Chad. We were at the hotel when I realized that I'd forgotten all the hanging clothes - leaving us with what we had on. It shouldn't have been that much of an issue for us, and it wasn't for Chad, but I'd had an accident at Mt. Bonnell that left my current shirt unsuitable for wearing out. What's funnier is that Chad was constantly asking me if he could carry picnic stuff for me because he was afraid I'd fall. In fact, he wouldn't allow me to carry the camera. I was slightly insulted until I ran my forehead directly into a tree branch, twisted in pain and caught my shirt on a tree.

Then, there was the lipstick. I bought red lipstick to impress Chad. This was the first day I'd worn it. The problem with it was that I was too aware of the lipstick. In an effort to keep it off my teeth, I was constantly running my tongue over them like that creepy toothpaste commercial. Also, to try to keep it off my drink and sandwich (red on sourdough, ewww), I had to open my lips like a horse. It eventually backfired and Chad took this picture after our picnic. Check out the chin. And over to the right, how did it get there??? Chad laughing at me was not the reaction I hoped for when I bought the red lipstick.

When we ended up at Pedernales Falls State Park, I was hopeful that we'd end up with pictures that were frame-worthy. It's such a beautiful place. However, I either can't take a good picture, or Chad doesn't know how to capture my good side. The wind didn't help. Oh, and the blue jean skirt with tennis shoes (remember, I was working with limited clothing options).

What am I doing with my legs???

In all fairness, I'm not the only one that takes a funny picture.

If my life were a Scrubs episode

If my life were a Scrubs episode, this would be a scene from last night:

(Here I'd close my eyes, tilt my head to the left, and inner-monologue in my best Dr. Dori(an) voice)

"I wonder why Pearce doesn't just learn from his little brothers that saying 'Yes ma'am' and 'I understand' doesn't make you weak, it just ends the fight quicker. He seems like a pretty smart kid.

Sometimes, I dream of going all Dr. Cox-ian on him. It would go like this:"

"My G-ghawd, Priscilla, what don't you understand about the words, "Don't argue?" I mean, I've been telling you the same instruction for ye-heears and you still aren't getting it. Come on, Patsy, you and I both know who's going to win this argument, so you might as well stop further channeling the voice of Rosie Perez before I do what I dreamed of doing when you had colic - and I say this with all the love in my heart - by getting out a roll of duct tape and covering your mouth and my ears with several layers then playing heavy metal music until the neighbors call police or my ears bleed and I become blissfully deaf. (huge breath) Now, whadaya say Patricia, let's stop all this petty whining and get back to MY being in charge here?"

"Still, Pearce is my little sporty bear. I guess I'll just love him and try to be the best mom I can be."

Three funny stories

There aren't any pictures today (and you'll be grateful after one of the stories), but these three moments of my day are worth retelling.

Pearce's funny moment:
On the way home from school, we always have great conversations. We were listening to the news and Obama came up (wonder of wonders). Pearce chimed in, "Mom, did you know that for every $100 you have, Obama wants to give $50 to people who are too lazy to get off their butts and get a job?" After laughing hysterically, I asked him where he was getting his information (I knew it wasn't from my uber-liberal ex). He replied quite snootily, "ALL my friends are Republican."

Cole's funny moment:
Today, Cole became "that kid." You know "that kid", right? The one that vomits in the classroom? Yes, Cole became that kid. Specifically, he became the sniper-vomitter. Not the runnner (the ones who tries to make it to the door), or the announcer-vomitter (the one who throws up so loud the Jr. High up the road knows it). Cole quietly vommitted so that the kids around him had to inform the teacher. At least, that's how Cole described it. To make the moment funny instead of just sad, when I picked Cole up from the nurse, he announced to everyone in the office that there were still 'chunks of kolache' in the output. And that he found it interesting that the color was red after drinking a grape drink for breakfast. That kid...

Stone's funny moment:
Stone went with me to Praise Team practice last night. In the nursery, they have a speaker that pipes in sound from the sanctuary so the volunteers can hear worship. This was a conversation he had with Jennifer, the woman who was taking care of him:

Stone "Is that my mommy singing?"
Jennifer "Yes."
Stone "That's my Mommy singing up there?" (pointing at the speaker in the ceiling)
Jennifer, "Yes, it is!"
Stone "Can we go see her up there?"
Jennifer "No, we can't see her up there."
Stone "Get a ladder."

Cade has some big, funny shoes to fill, no???

Talk about your unwelcome surprises!!!

My Mom posted in her blog about unwelcome surprises. We had a moment today that would have gone PERFECT with her post.

You might remember that my friend Megan is very...um...creative with her cooking. Here's a flashback in case you don't remember the tri-colored cookies that caused a funny couple of posts on her blog and mine.

Today, her son had his 3rd birthday party at a local park. Megan did not disappoint my expectations - homemade cake, hot dogs with all the fixins, and a labeled goodie bag for each kid. Within each bag, there's a headband, a crazy straw, a ball, and a...well, let me change to Chad-mode from this point:

Begin Chad's inner-monologue -

"Hmm, what is this?
A moldy peanut butter cup?
No, this must be one of Megan's wacky-colored confections" (if Chad used the word confection).
Hmm, here, I'll give Stone a bite...
Oh, no...why is Stone gagging? What have I done?"

End Chad's inner-monologue

At this point, someone has pointed out to Chad that the goodie in question is actually a home-made crayon. Please enjoy the pictures - my tribute to Chad's and Stone's unwelcome surprise.

Here's the 'candy'. In all fairness, it is shaped like a peanut butter cup.

Stone's first reaction.

Check out the spit!!!

Daddy trying desperately to get the crayon out.
At least Chad didn't beat himself up too bad...

Yes, you are correct in thinking, "Holy cow! Is that crayon embedded in his teeth?"

Halloween Catch-up

Our wireless ethernet adapter broke and I've been without internet for awhile, so this post is a little late, but when your kids dress up like Star Wars characters, it's worth posting late. At least, that's true if the quote beside your senior picture reads "May the force be with you."

Also, when your child is as AWESOME as Cole is at becoming his character, it makes the pictures so much better.


Let me present the Chronicles of the Wayward Hat (are you getting that with Stone there's always a Chronicle of something???)...


And finally! Here's the funniest picture of the evening. Remember when I said I couldn't wait for Stone to come out of the fake smile stage? Careful what you wish for. And, how attractive does that mask make Pearce's nose look??? Wait, that's not Pearce, it's Beaker from the Muppets!!!

Beautiful Boys

I was looking at Pumpkin Patch pictures to decide which humorous angle I'd take on my next post. Remember, I started this blog because these kids are so funny. Sometimes, though, their beauty just halts me. Smile...








Okay! Enough of the mushy stuff! Let's get back to our roots here. Of course, we can't have a nice, calm day at the patch. There's got to be drama, action, comedy, and some sort of peril (in this case it was me trying to keep up with three kids running in opposite directions within 20 feet of a major road).

We started by Mom trying to get a good picture of all four boys. It was a lost cause. It was the wrong time of day and the sun was in their eyes. Poor Cade...

Then, Mom had to try to get the cheeky shot of a baby in the pumpkin patch. Not only is this one of the worst pictures of Cade ever (what's up with that right ear?), but also one of my worst attempts EVER at a cute picture. It occurs to me that he looks a bit like Sloth from Goonies?


Next, we have the Chronicles of the Quitter Jeans. You know what quitter socks are, right? The ones that keep sliding down your calves like they are just...too...tired...to...stay...up...
Stone had quitter jeans on; which is interesting, because they were two sizes too small for him.
At first, he had no knowledge of this problem.

Then, he made half-hearted attempts to rectify the situation (including enlisting big bro's help).

Finally, he gave himself up to defeat and just went about his business with pants fully down. Ahh... life before self-esteem issues...

Here are the action shots:

Here is the drama:

And here is the picture that almost came out good. I can't WAIT for Stone to come out of this fake smile stage.